How has this article reached you so far?
If there’s any emotional blockages or agressions rising up I understand, I hope you will forgive me and be understanding that in writing this, I am risking a lot of hate thrown my way merely for bringing a psychological aspect to light.
(Continuing article below)
If we’re still carrying on through then that’s a good sign.
The “d” word is a very delicate one to use, as by default it is to say that one’s perspective is subconsciously refusing awareness on a certain topic or theme.
“Denial”(my claim as the ‘d’ word, and claim that we all have it in one way, shape, or form.)
that if as a psychological aspect “denial” would be a thing that we – as one suffers it – wouldn’t be able to see it or know we are expressing denial by default – is a scary concept.
It’s a stage of awakening as I would call it, and universal in awareness as that only upon humbling ourselves to the notion and possibility of-in which where we, in our egos, may be wrong, would we transcend our shortcomings. Luckily, we have each other to see our faults. Or is it lucky? And where do we fall short of receiving that blessing as beneficial?
When we hear a word, or receive a stimulus, it is only internalized and then projected of sequential emotion after the meaning of it is accepted as it’s association – but these meanings we apply, WE apply.
No one else.
So we see here, taking responsibility is paramount to awareness.
Still, even due the instance and even due the meaning applied, it is only internalized to reflect the corresponding emotional denial if – and only if – that emotion is already there, presently being denied.
example: A man boasts his good qualities to a woman in emotional response to the inner insecure backdrop of subconscious feelings of unworthiness. Although on an aware level he believes he is self-confident and by all means sees only that experientially, the pain within him can be seen – even if perhaps only subconsciously – by the woman.
An example here of a – by all standards – sincere and well educated woman, educating the public on “the natures of a narcissist”, while mildly displaying a short show of narcissism. It’s important that we in this instance of watching, not apply status-diminishing meanings upon this, nor ego-inflating judgements of contrasts, lest we become hypocritically, narcissistic in act.
(Note: I am aware that this does feel weird “showcasing” this video of her, but it is a good example, and we all do sign over our rights of our videos when we create a YouTube account. So long as the video player is an embed, and has is clickable to reach its source hosting on YouTube, I am also within my rights to embed it here.)
In my opinion she’s not wrong in any way, she is totally correct. I think we all could agree with her in her statements. If we empathize and feel at least mildly humiliated in this being shared here – as if we were her – then we are doing and experiencing opposite of what a narcissist expresses.
So as we find it, the true key to cultivate positivity and love, away from our own denials – of which are nearly impossible of us to see in ourselves by default – is to practice seeing ourselves in every moment, and looking within to ask ourselves, “Where does this emotional stimulation arise from? And why do I feel the re-active nature to project this emotion?”
I have a feeling like I might be blamed for doing this probably by a few narcissists that are protective of their denials (we all are) as they would be by the nature of it. It’s nothing to be or feel ashamed of if we can only become aware of it within ourselves, as that if we just empathize more and more with others, we can all evolve past this – or – we stay stuck in the cycle of narcissistic warfare and karmic expressions of harming another while forever creating excuses and “reasonings” to self-vindicate our egos from experiencing the shame.
She is not unique here, and I’ve said it before already – we all have traits of denial – in my opinion. You could search the hoard of videos on YouTube yourself, witnessing the ironies of blames against “narcissists” as though it were a “race” or brand of human, other than a mental state of which we all express from time to time – whenever we blame someone.
In the past I might have said “That’s not what narcissism means, it means: …. “
– while totally forgetting that I myself have fabricated the “meaning” of the word, applying it to what associations of it I might, as collected from my own experience of what it might “mean”, but I find that if we look at the emotional foundation of it in total, from causality in-effect, to social implications of conjecture vs propriety, we’re left with nothing but the raw elements of emotion.
These raw elements can always be found in layers of projection vis-a-vis acceptance, and as we simplify everything around us – we do come down to the element of unconditional love.
We can only understand another to that same depth of which we’ve discovered within ourselves, emotionally. In essence, to understand another at all takes just that – empathy and compassion for the fellow human being, and for life as any living entity itself.
We can deduce this as factual, scientific, measurable, and even experientially valid ourselves in our daily lives, just by looking at the simple psychological aspects at play, as mentioned above:
One being that both the person acting as a narcissist, and the person acting as an empath, would both be aiming towards settling the issue through communication, aka “debate”. Debate could be healthy, and it very much is a needed factor in society. What matters here is the intent.
And the other being that from either’s perspective, each would appear to be the narcissist. I propose here that logically, in act – both would be narcissistic to a degree dependant on if they are arguing, and reject empathizing with one another.
If we take care to notice the delicate way I worded the sentences in color above, perhaps we can empathize that for the most part we as humans have been on both sides of the fence.
At no time or single moment, can we, as an individual human, encompass all perspectives of values. In our lives we can go through many experiences and in those moments – understand the innate values that would and could be seen from them – but even later down the road, upon reaching that values opposite spectrum, we would then forget, be blind to, and in some cases even be in denial of and lacking seeing – the values wisdom we previously held.
.. as I always say,
To be humble is to admit to the self
“I am but one eyeball, and to see depth,
we need two.”-Skyapaka